What do birthdays mean to you? Perhaps they’re a chance to celebrate with family and friends. Maybe you enjoy opening cards and presents, or perhaps you’d rather slip quietly into another year without any fuss at all.

Whatever your feelings about birthdays, there’s usually one thing they have in common – they’re one of the few days when we allow ourselves to feel special.

But what if we didn’t save that feeling for just one day a year?

If you’re wondering why I’m writing about birthdays, it’s because this blog was published on 11 August – which is my birthday!!

Every Day Should be Your Birthday

“You’re already awesome. You don’t need a birthday card to tell you that.”

Dr Sue Hewitt

Birthdays are wonderful because they give us permission to pause. Other people tell us how much they appreciate us. They buy us treats, cook us meals, take us to nice places, make us laugh and remind us that we’re important.

The question is this – why do we wait for everyone else to do it?

Imagine treating yourself with the same kindness and generosity that your closest friends show you on your birthday. Not in a grand or extravagant way, but in small, thoughtful moments throughout the year.

Many of us spend our time looking after everyone else. We juggle work, family, friends and countless responsibilities, often putting ourselves at the bottom of the list. When we finally do make time for ourselves, it can be filled with things we think we should do rather than things we genuinely want to do.

• “I really should exercise.”
• “I ought to learn how to do meditation.”
• “I should be studying something useful.”
• “That night out/holiday won’t book itself. I’d better get on with it.”

There’s nothing wrong with any of those activities, if they bring you joy. But if you’re only doing them because you feel you ought to, because you think others expect you to, perhaps they’re not the best use of your precious time.

Instead, ask yourself a different question.

What would I choose to do if I had all the time in the world?

The answer doesn’t have to involve hours of free time. It might only be ten minutes.

• Ten minutes reading a good book
• Ten minutes sitting in the garden
• Ten minutes sketching, knitting, listening to music, doing just a few lunges or squats, taking the dog for a walk or simply enjoying a cup of tea, without rushing on to the next job.

Sometimes it’s not even about what you’re doing. It’s about how you think about it. Imagine you’re staying in a hotel overnight for work. You need to eat, so you head to the restaurant. You could think, “I’m having dinner just because I have to eat.” Or you could think, “Someone else is cooking my meal tonight. Someone else will wash up. I can simply sit here and take my time, enjoy being looked after.”

Exactly the same meal. Completely different experience. The activity hasn’t changed, but your mindset has.

It’s often the same in everyday life. A bath, a quiet walk, a cup of coffee in the sunshine or ten peaceful minutes before everyone else wakes up can become a gift to yourself when you choose to see it that way.

We can spend so much of our lives waiting for permission to put ourselves first. The truth is, we don’t need permission.

Birthdays remind us that we’re worth celebrating. You can remember to celebrate YOU on all the other days of the year too. What will today’s celebration of you be? And tomorrow’s?

Take Ten Minutes

This month, find ten minutes each day that belong entirely to you. Protect that time. Choose something to do in that time because it makes you smile, not because you think you should be doing it.

It doesn’t need to be productive. It doesn’t need to impress anyone. It just needs to remind you that you’re worth celebrating every single day of the year.

What am I doing to celebrate me on my birthday?

On my birthday this year I’ll be on holiday on the Moray coast in Scotland, with no clear birthday plans, as yet. However, I can tell you what the perfect holiday birthday will include:

• A walk along the beach
• Late breakfast
• A visit to the ice cream parlour
• Favourite food for lunch
• Ideally some rock climbing (but not this year due to knee surgery)
• A great film in the evening in our cosy holiday house
• No work emails or texts
• Enjoying a good book.

Each of these things also occur in normal days throughout the year as mini-celebrations. What will you put in your 10 minutes just for you today. Drop me a line to let me know.

This photo in this blog is a birthday climb from a few years ago – me on the Hotel California route in the Aguilles Rouges, Chamonix. Thanks to my photographer, Mr Griffin.