How perfect will your Christmas be? Will you spend lots of precious time and energy trying to get it right in every way and trying to please everyone?

Or will you spend your seasonal break with the people with whom you would really like to spend your time? The people who support and care about you, no matter how ‘perfect’ you make Christmas?

At this time of year, I want to focus on the people who can support you. Let’s look for your Little Helpers and see how they can help you make it just right!

“Maybe Christmas, she thought, doesn’t come from a store.
Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more!”

Mrs Claus

• Who are the people that pick you up or make you feel special?
• Who are the people that you can call when you’re feeling down?
• Who are the people that always give you good advice?

You might think of them as Santa’s Little Helpers, and they’re always there – not just for Christmas. However, at Christmas, there may be extra times when you need somebody to pick you up when you’re feeling down and need to feel a bit special. You might need to confide in someone. Or maybe you need some extra advice through the festive period.

Christmas can be stressful, especially if you’re trying to please everybody else, or if you’re worried about the cost of Christmas, or maybe you’re doing it for the first time as a family. Some people feel that they really need to ‘do’ Christmas, because it’s expected. But is it what you really want? You don’t have to do Christmas as your parents did, as your partner’s parents do, or your siblings or anyone else expects you to. There is no rule that says you have to celebrate Christmas in a certain way – if at all!

This is where you can ask your Little Helpers for assistance.

Image credit: Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash

Who are your Little Helpers?

They could be your children or step-children, your spouse or partner, your best friends or even your neighbours. No one says that you have to arrange it all yourself. Ask those around you, those in your family, household or co-habiting group, to see how they can contribute and make it a team effort. This also helps everyone feel included.

Do you have a Christmas Role Model?

Think about what is important to you at Christmas. Is it a religious celebration for you? Or time for family and friends? Or time for partying, reflection, walking or skiing? Or even time to do nothing at all!?

If you want to do Christmas your way, this is the year to do it! Break with old traditions and create some new ones. Think of someone you admire, who spends the holiday break doing what you would like to do. Ask them how they make it happen and see what you can incorporate into your Christmas.

Who are your Christmas Heroes?

When it feels like it’s all getting to be a bit too much, who can rescue you? When you feel overwhelmed when it’s getting too stressful, or too expensive, or too much about pleasing everyone, who is the hero you can call on? Who is the one person who can take you away from it and help you to look after you? Who can pick you up and make you feel special? Ask them to whisk you away for an afternoon, just a few hours, to help you regain your perspective.

Christmas Presents or Christmas Presence?

If you don’t know what to buy someone for Christmas, don’t fret about getting it right or getting it wrong. Just ask them! And remember that you don’t have to buy ‘stuff’ that might just end up in the cupboard. Experiences, days out, or time doing what people love, with the people they love, is a great present. What about giving a homemade gift? It could be jars of jam, or a personalised voucher to be used at a favourite restaurant – as long as they take you along too! And it doesn’t have to cost anything either – the gift of your time to walk, talk and have fun together is worth more than you can imagine.

Santa’s Little Helpers are everywhere and they are just waiting for you to ask for their help. Christmas is not the time to try to do it all yourself. Surround yourself with people who care about you, with whom you want to spend time. Ask for help and allocate tasks so that everyone can contribute, lighten the load and enjoy doing their bit. And remember that you can even buy a turkey crown that’s already stuffed if you want – or go out to eat on Christmas day, or have beans on toast!

There is only one You. Give yourself the present this Christmas of asking for support from your Little Helpers and you’ll have a much more festive time.

Have a very Merry Christmas – and a positive, prosperous New Year!